I have a condition. It’s serious and follows me everywhere. I’ve been self-diagnosed with pre-senioritis. Classes don’t start for another month, yet despite summer not being over, I find myself more unwilling to return than ever before.

I’m going to go out on a limb and say I suspect I’m not alone in this either.

Just about everyone short of overzealous undergrads who base their self-worth on letter grades can relate to dragging their feet on the way back to College Station ahead of another year.

In the case of seniors, especially my class, allow me to be the unofficial spokesperson when I say we could not relate to this dread more. We’re spent, tired, worn out, exhausted and ready to move on.

Call us Debbie downers, negative Nancys or for gender inclusivity’s sake, cynical Carls, but as the 21st of August creeps up to eventually overtake the warm grasp of summer, I sense the all too familiar conundrum of being forced to restart yet again.

Whether you’re a senior, junior or even a freshman, you’re also quite accustomed to the anxiety August brings year after year.

You know eventually there’s an end to the essays and exams you’ve become engrained to dedicate your life studying for, but after 15 years of having to prove ourselves, and in turn, being given a grade indicative of our performance, we’re sick of it!

Not for the typical mundane reasons that first come to mind though.

First, let me preface our very serious and mutually shared state by saying it’s not the schoolwork side of things that is causing this dismay.

After three years, I’m sure few of us are wallowing in fear of upcoming capstone projects or senior research theses. For the most part, we’ve been prepped for that. After all, if we’re not ready now, it’s probably just the professors who failed us, or lack thereof.

And before you call us lazy or entitled — Facebook crowd I’m looking at you — just remember the ammunition you’re using is the same reason we’re feeling this fatigue to begin with. We’re three-fourths of the way done but still feel so far from the finish line.

Of course, another symptom of our collective condition could be due to having to part with summer. I still stand by the initial statement that summer is overrated, however, for some, it’s their favorite time of year. No school or responsibilities weighing you down is almost too good to be true. Sure, you might have an internship to report to, but I think we can all agree there’s a big difference between showing up for that versus balancing 15+ credit hours and a social life.

Summer is a unique time of year where we have more free time than the rest of the nine months of the year. The memories we make during this time make it hard for anyone to part with summer.

For me it was watching an impromptu drive-in screening of “Barbie” surrounded by cornfields with fireflies being the only source of light to the snack bar serving hot funnel cakes. Need I mention I’m in Indiana?

Summer has its moments, no doubt, but again, having to bury the naive and comfortable lifestyle summer creates is a pain we’ve repeated annually for as long as we can remember.

So, if summer’s annual demise or being timid of the few remaining courses aren’t the sum of the respective clouds raining on our senior parade, what are?

Well, for starters, we’re the last men and women standing in College Station. There’s pros and cons on the way to obtaining the legendary scroll that promises good fortune and job security. One of these cons is making friends only to watch them leave.

The primary factor that usually draws us back to school, or at least makes our return year after year a little more tolerable, is our friends. Watching the ones we looked up to for their infinite wisdom in situations, like if we should order more tequila shots, embark on their own journey, never to return again, is a hard pill to swallow.

It makes it even worse when their collective calls from beyond the academia grave tell us to savor the time we have left because “Believe me when I say, there is no time like college.” They graduated and left us for dead. Does someone have the world’s smallest violin?

Another reason could also be that we’ve gotten a taste of the auspicious ‘real world.’ Quite a number of degree tracks require a hands-on internship with 200+ hours of experience and multiple work samples.

After finally seeing firsthand the work we’ll be getting paid to do, senior year comes and immediately corrals us back into the penniless lifestyle we had just escaped. The obvious other pro that comes with a professional lifestyle is no homework. Sign me up.

Cue the record scratch and the cheesy narration from almost every early 2000s movie trailer because now that you’re all caught up on how I ended up in this predicament, I suppose it’s time for some sort of resolution.

The resolution I speak of, I’ve come to discover is actually a mindset. A change of heart even, and it’s a revelation I’d like to extend to the rest of my cursed class.

Despite not bursting at the seams with gleeful joy upon my ‘one final ride’ in College Station, I am content with knowing that more adventures await. While we may convince ourselves that we’re ready for the professional world, it’s important to note there is still more to learn.

Try as we may to pretend we’re totally over picking our friends up off the filthy floor at a dingy-dive bar, we have to understand these days, much like summer, are coming to a close faster than we realize.

Being an alumnus of the infamous “Covid Class” of 2020, we missed out on the things every high school student looks forward to all four years. Prom, sports seasons, senior skip day, the class trip, you name it.

Rest assured that while our voyage through college hasn’t exactly been ordinary, the last thing we’re going to do is waste our final year reminiscing about past times and people. If the worldly pandemic that shan’t be named taught us anything, it’s to appreciate intimacy and subtle interactions we take for granted every day.

Especially those moments you struggle to keep your eyes open at 8 a.m. lecture.

So if you run into any of us seniors on the way to class or while we’re frantically writing a last-minute paper, I can’t exactly promise we’ll have a smile on our faces. But just like everyone else, while we may grumble, “my life is so hard,” just know that some part of us appreciates situations that can only be described as … college.

Benjamin Barnes is a telecommunication media studies senior and opinion writer for The Battalion.