Rating: 5/10
Spoilers ahead for “You, Me & Tuscany.”
If you’re anything like me, then you enjoy curling up in front of the television to watch a comforting, romantic movie when the weather gets cold — specifically, a Hallmark movie. There’s something special about knowing every sweet plot point that makes those kinds of movies hit, guaranteed to wrap-up in a happy ending.
“You, Me & Tuscany” reminded me of one of these films. This new romantic comedy from Will Packer has hit theaters, and cinema executives are watching its box-office performance with a close eye. We haven’t seen a blockbuster rom-com featuring two Black leads since “Think Like a Man,” and according to other filmmakers, movers and shakers in the industry are allegedly hesitant to invest in more films if “You, Me & Tuscany” doesn’t profit.
The film follows Anna, a culinary school dropout, who has always wanted to visit Italy. Her mother’s death puts a pause on those dreams, however, and she takes a hiatus instead, housesitting for people happier than her and living vicariously through them.
Then she meets Matteo, a handsome Italian who encourages her to live out her dreams and visit Italy — while conveniently mentioning his empty villa in Tuscany — and Anna makes a spur-of-the-moment decision: She flies to Italy with only $500 in her pocket, ready for the vacation of a lifetime.
She quickly realizes that a little planning might’ve been smart. Her arrival in Tuscany is tainted by the realization that every single hotel is booked, prompting her to make another spontaneous choice and change gears, deciding to sleep in Matteo’s empty home.
At first, she enjoys her time there — doing her laundry, taking in the view, trying on an engagement ring she finds in a drawer — but her happiness is cut short when Matteo’s family discovers her, and suddenly she’s faced with having to either admit she broke into his home or come up with an excuse.
The ring on Anna’s finger makes the decision for her. She lies, pretending to be Matteo’s fiancee. As she plays into the charade, however, she finds herself falling in love with his boisterous Italian family.
Especially his cousin, Michael.
The two leads — played by Halle Bailey and Regé-Jean Page — are both entertaining to watch. Bailey brings the same wide-eyed innocence and curiosity she embodied as Ariel in “The Little Mermaid,” and Page isn’t shy about letting his “Bridgerton” roots shine. They certainly have chemistry, and each played into the characters with a certain whimsy that the Italian countryside requires.
The color grading was also a standout. Italy is a lush, romantic place, and despite the hospital greys that Hollywood has been favoring recently in movies like the new live-action “Moana,” I found “You, Me & Tuscany” to be cheerfully vibrant.
Unfortunately, this movie isn’t all sunshine and dreamy vineyards. The language is extremely harsh, particularly for a romantic movie, and there are a good number of off-colored jokes that don’t match the otherwise family-friendly tone.
For instance, one of Matteo’s family members has a running gag about her side piece, an Italian plumber, which seemed especially misplaced as she is married with a child. There’s nothing funny about cheating, and that particular unresolved storyline seems vulgar in a movie about finding your true love.
As I mentioned before, the plot feels a lot like that of a Hallmark movie. Many of the events and “twists” are predictable, even reusing some classic rom-com lines. One scene in particular — where Michael removes his shirt to protect Anna’s hair from the sprinklers in the vineyard — was both cute and a little extra. And the entire theater couldn’t help but laugh a little when we were given several slow-motion shots vividly reminiscent of “Bridgerton.”
While this film suffered more from a poor script than any of the settings or actors, I enjoyed watching the whimsical plot unfold. Most of the comedy was really funny, and the vibrant setting was a joy to see. It almost made me want to travel to Tuscany to experience it for myself!
We can all agree that Hallmark-esque movies are their own breed of cinematic excellency, but you don’t go watch a Hallmark movie in a theater. “You, Me & Tuscany” is heartwarming and fun, but maybe the kind of movie to watch from your couch instead of a theater.
Marie Kneeland is an English honors freshman and opinion writer for The Battalion.
