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The Battalion

The Student News Site of Texas A&M University - College Station

The Battalion

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“Serenity:” boring, bad and nonsensical

Serenity+began+running+in+theaters+January+25.
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Serenity began running in theaters January 25.

“Serenity” is a bad movie. The plot makes no sense, the big “twist” that comes halfway through is absolutely idiotic, and the entire film comes across as so full of itself when in fact it has almost no substance at all. I have no idea how Anne Hathaway, Matthew McConaughey and Jason Clarke were all roped into this trainwreck of a film.
Let’s start with the plot. The film starts off as a fishing movie. McConaughey is the classic tortured fisherman who drinks all day and is obsessed with catching “him,” a specific tuna that he has named Justice. Then, out of nowhere, they drop “the bomb” and the whole movie changes. I won’t spoil it in case for some inexplicable reason anyone still wants to go see the movie after reading this review, but let’s just say it takes a boring film about fishing and turns it into a really stupid film about something else. It was honestly one of the dumbest, most ill-conceived twists I’ve ever seen. I don’t know how anyone thought this movie was a good idea.
The last part of the movie I expected to have a problem with was the acting, but here we are. You’d think seasoned professionals like Hathaway and McConaughey would bring at least a little bit of life to the screen, but neither of them offered the film anything positive through their flat and bland performances. I expect they were hindered significantly by the script, but they certainly didn’t try too hard to do it any favors. A good 70 percent of all the dialogue in the movie was people saying various things to McConaughey, and McConaughey promptly ignoring them and walking away.
One of the worst parts about “Serenity” is that the whole movie has an air of loftiness to it. It takes itself far too seriously, like the director, Steven Knight, really thought he was making something special. The film tries to be emotional and significant, when in reality, it couldn’t be farther from those things. The “twist” effectively invalidates the entire movie and everyone in it, telling audiences that nothing any of the characters did really mattered at all. It’s idiotic. It tries so hard to tell an emotional story, but by the end, I was asking myself “Who cares?”
The film tries to use sex as some sort of emotional device, using moans and several edgy shots of McConaughey’s butt to… I don’t know, keep the audience engaged? The movie is so boring it’s almost necessary.
Do not see “Serenity.” If you’re curious about what the big “twist” is, look it up online instead of going to see in person. You’ll be glad you did. If you’re a McConaughey fan who will go to any movie just because his name is attached to it like I am, definitely don’t see this movie. It’ll only lower him in your eyes. The same goes for Hathaway. I can’t think of one single reason that anyone would need or want to see this film. There is nothing original or interesting about it, and it even manages to make world class actors look like fools. Let’s all just forget “Serenity” exists and move on to the next film, okay?

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