At The Battalion, our writers and columnists are required to maintain a Twitter account to hold them accountable to the public and encourage interaction with the community. Thanks to this policy, our desk members received an abundance of encouraging comments and constructive criticism last year. Unfortunately, all of these positive results have come at a high cost: browsing Twitter.
So without further ado: the opinion staff’s picks for the worst tweets of 2022:
Opinion Editor Caleb Elizondo, @CalebElizondo7 —
Have you ever wondered what would happen if you fed an AI chatbot a nonstop stream of Fox News content and then gave it a Twitter account? Or perhaps forced a Tucker Carlson monologue through a game of telephone and several rounds of Google Translate? To the curious reader, I humbly present Representative Clay Higgins.
While most of Higgins’ feed is fairly predictable, a long scroll will inevitably yield a nugget of comedy gold. Woke sky? Non-binary fuss? Intercontinental ballistic tweets? How could I not select this as the worst tweet of 2022?
Opinion Writer Charis Adkins, @Charis_Batt —
English is both my first language and my major, and I still have no idea what’s going on. It took a 15-minute foray into the vernacular wasteland that is Urban Dictionary for me to have a tentative grasp on the meaning of this tweet, and even then I’m not 100% confident.
The fact that we live in a world where over 10,000 people, not only understood, but physically liked whatever message this is trying to convey is an exhausting notion. Be careful out there, folks — and maybe it’s time to bookmark Urban Dictionary.
Opinion Writer Valerie Muñoz, @Val4Batt —
This tweet comes from a very serious Harvard grad and political pundit. The question is, does he think that John Legend is as admirable as Volodymyr Zelensky because of his legendary last name or his charming emails?
Here’s my piece of advice: even though it may be flattering to get a “personal message” from a celebrity, it is perfectly acceptable to refrain from endorsing their non-existent bid for president. I’m not exactly sure Legend’s “All of Me” was supposed to be interpreted as political.
Opinion Writer Ana Sofia Sloane, @anasofiasloane —
There’s just so much to unpack here: The wild take that President Vladimir Putin’s decision to invade Ukraine stems from bad parenting, the painfully dramatic and poorly written poetry, the failure to read the room …
While AnnaLynne McCord wishes she could’ve shown Putin some motherly love to unlock his potential as a “powerful being of light,” I wish Twitter as a whole could’ve been deactivated as the devastating Russian-Ukraine conflict unfolded in the East last year.
Assistant Opinion Editor Ryan Lindner, @ryanlindner12 —
Rockets launched. Cities destroyed. The ever-looming possibility of World War III. But, hey, at least the “aesthetics” of it all look so very epic! Nuclear Armageddon? Who cares as long as the vibes are right?
Whether it’s the tone-deaf composition or the weird child-like ignorance of human suffering, this is one of those tweets that makes you yearn for the inevitable demise of this cursed app.
Opinion Writer Lilia Elizondo, @LiliaElizondo05 —
The reasoning for this is simple. No one wants a calendar. We want Mr. Martin to finally complete Winds of Winter. Why is he doing this to us?
Opinion Writer Benjamin Barnes, @Ben_Batt24 —
There have always been questions that piqued the interest of, and defined human curiosity. What is the meaning of life? Are we alone in this desolate universe? HA! Mere child’s play compared to the age-old question anyone sorry enough to call themselves an avid user Twitter wrestles with daily. Is Nick Adams just a pathetic moron who’s mad at the world, or is he the greatest troll our generation has ever seen?
Opinion Writer Saanya Troutman, @Saanyalache —
J.K. Rowling, known for her notorious anti-transgender takes, ended the year with a classic unprovoked jab using the term “TERF” as “trans-exclusionary radical feminist.” What better way to enjoy the holidays than to attack an already marginalized group, some of which are the readers who grew up on your novels? Merry Christmas, I guess.